The Cost of QuietColette Jane FehrLabel: Headline HomeDescription: An empowering healing guide that reveals the true cost of avoidant behaviour in a relationship - disconnection disengagement and divorce - and shows how we can instead learn to speak up and start connecting with the ones we love most.'I wish I had spoken up sooner.'People think relationships fail because of deal breakers like infidelity finances or parenting problems. But the real culprit is often much less dramatic: emotional disconnection after years of staying silent and avoiding conflict. We're afraid to say what we need because we worry about what will come next. Avoidant behaviour - the need to 'keep the peace' rather than dealing with conflict head on - isn't our fault. Our ingrained attachment wiring urges us to sidestep day-to-day disputes and brush lingering problems under the rug. But silence is a losing proposition in the long term leading us to self-abandon and essentially 'quiet quit' our relationships. We can make another choice. In The Cost of Quiet licensed marriage and family therapist Colette Jane Fehr shines a light on the epidemic of avoidant behaviour and how to overcome it. Drawing from the latest attachment science and evidence-based therapies she's used to repair the bond between hundreds of couples Fehr gives us the tools to approach those we love with openness honesty and vulnerability. The ultimate goal: a securely attached relationship that engages with conflict productively and the confidence that comes from speaking up and being heard - because a good relationship is worth fighting for.
